Change A Diaper, Change The Sheets, Change In Our Lives Lately

So several of my recent posts have been about, among other things: 

• Mom guilt.
  
• Potty training.
  
• Following Marta while Berit plays alone.
  
• Berit's blossoming maturity.
  
• Never getting anything accomplished because I'm dealing with all of the above.
  

And things have changed recently. Like, within the past few days. For example:

• I've given up potty training completely.
  
• I no longer have to follow Marta anywhere.
  
• My house is clean, even after a playdate this morning, and I even made risotto with asparagus, peas and spinach for dinner. And pork tenderloin! 

The biggest change is with Marta, who plays completely independently now and will be busy for hours at a time. The doors are closed around the house and the gate at the stairs is up, so she can just wander with minimal following. It's a whole new world, I tell you. I watch them. Watch them! Who knew I would ever just watch them? 

Right now, as I sit in a chair and type this, the girls are playing together for the first time in history. They're running around the circle linking our living room, kitchen and entryway, laughing. Berit just said to Marta, "You're almost a big girl now!", and gave her kisses on her head. If I wasn't watching it I wouldn't believe it.

However, another not-so-wonderful change is with Berit, who is constantly droopy and whiny and begging me to play with her, because she suddenly doesn't know what to do by herself. Not every now and then, when a mother should do things with her child, but constantly. Like, even if we're playing and I get up to answer the phone, it's on with the wailing, weepy, "Mooooooooommmy, mooooooommmmy, plaaaaaaay with meeeeeee." There's a lot of rolling around on the ground, weakly picking things up and tossing them away, etc. It's maddening. I find myself saying really inappropriate things, like, "Jeez, you're never going to get to go to school because you're such a whiner." And, "Just go away from me right now. I don't want to play with a whiny little baby." I know! Isn't that terrible? I promise to never do it again. I just needed to tell someone. And by someone, I mean all of you.

But I see great things on the horizon at our house. My kids will love each other! Share toys! Play all day long and teach themselves and feed themselves and I can just sit in a chair and blog all day! 

Or something like that. The simple freedom of not following a person during every waking second is perfect enough for now.