Friday, January 15, 2010

Berit, Unexplained

We're not sure what's going on with Berit these days. While she tends to be dramatic in every possible way, at every possible time, she never has whole weeks that are just "off." On Monday she told her teacher she had a tummy ache, and when I was called to pick her up from school I learned that she needed to potty but really just wanted to come home. On Tuesday night I told her to go to sleep, because she had school in the morning, and she yelled at me that she didn't want to go to school, and "Didn't want Marta to go to school, either!" ?

At school today she told her teacher that she didn't want to go to school anymore, and when it was circle time she went over to a rocking chair in the corner of class and said she was "frustrated."

This is a girl who loves school, who wanted to go to school so badly that we sent her as soon as she turned three, in the middle of the second semester. She's never not wanted to be at school.

In addition: For the past two nights, she has wet the bed. She has never, ever wet the bed, besides the occasional random bed wetting at my parents' house (which we chalked up to her not doing her regular routine, not having the same access to the potty that she knows here, being overtired, etc.). Not even when she was potty training did she wet the bed, really.

Now, here are a few practical things to point out: On Sunday, the day before this all began, we returned from my parents' house where she always has the time of her life. Before we left my parents' house on Sunday she begged me to "move to Greenville," said that she "never wanted to leave." When I explained that she has friends and family and school here in Petoskey, that we couldn't just move when we wanted to, she got very angry with me and told me she didn't care about those things in Petoskey, because she just wanted to be in Greenville with my parents and siblings.

In fact, we typically call the Monday after a Greenville weekend "Black Monday," because the girls are back to reality and it's hard for them to adjust. So we chalked Monday up to that.

Today at school she told her teacher about a book she loves, Angelina Ballerina, in which the character Angelina never wants to go to school, only wants to dance. Coincidentally, this week we talked about how Berit's dance class would be starting soon, and she keeps saying things like, "I NEVER want to eat dinner; I only want to dance." So there's that, too.

But what about the bed-wetting? What about the sadness all week, and the unkind attitude toward her sister, and the pushing and all of the punishments she's been getting (movie privileges taken away, toys taken away, etc.), which is completely unlike her? Could it really be in anticipation of dance class? Or should I be looking deeper into this? Thoughts from all of you fantastic parents would be most appreciated.


Kimberly Reed said...

She is at that age were sometimes there just isn't an explanation! :( I dislike the phrase "it's just a phase" but, unfortunately that is the case sometimes.....
hang in there and just love her in the good and bad :)
Probably not the words of wisdom you were looking for but, all children go through these phases and we all want to understand and fix it!
You are amazing parents ....... just keep up the great job!
Love you

Lisa said...

Update: Berit is back to herself. I had a little talk with her about Angelina and how much she actually loves school, and how Berit can do both school and dance, and she didn't even bring up Greenville. We've done a lot of fun family things since last week, and she doesn't seem like her funk will continue. Thanks to all the friends out there who e-mailed/messaged me and commented here. You were all right. :)