Nicknames

Not long ago, Berit and Marta were making up nicknames for themselves. This is common; their typical nicknames are words like Sparkleworks and Purple Unicorn Rainbow. This day, however, was exceptional. They were rhyming, and Berit decided she wanted to start with her nickname of choice, "Jenna." Therefore, Marta got "Henna." On a roll, they went forward with nicknames for everyone: "Kenna," "Lenna," "Senna." They got to Trevor, thought a minute, and said (with no silliness intended), "PENIS."

Now wait a minute. Remember we're rhyming here, at least sort of. It's pronounced "Pennnn-isssss." You know, Pen-is.

We were eating dinner at the time and I actually choked on my pasta. And while I like to think I'm a bit more mature than I was 10, 20 years ago, every time they call Trevor Pennnn-issss my cheeks puff out, my laugh reflex crumbles and I am inconsolable. The funniest thing about this nickname is that it refuses to quit. They love calling themselves Jenna and Henna, and calling me Lenna. Sorry, Trev. They love your nickname, too.

Recently Trevor's brother Jason called to chat and mentioned that he'd heard about the nickname. The girls overheard the conversation and decided to give Uncle Jason a nickname, too. They began rhyming things with what was in front of them, what they could see around them, whatever. They finally decided that they'd found the perfect nickname, HAHAHA, it's SO UNCLE JASON! Perfect!

Balzack. Yes, Balllll-zzzzsack.

You may be reading this, wondering what in the world we do around here to put such thoughts in their heads, so that even subconsciously they come up with these types of nicknames. Sincerely, I don't even think they remember what a male's privates are called. I know Marta has never had it explained to her, and Berit only once or twice, when changing around a buddy when they were small. It's never fascinated them whatsoever, and even now, with these nicknames, they have no idea that they're anything, well, anatomical.

They're just so fitting, that's all.