Thursday, December 3, 2009

Growing Pains, Smart Assery and Potty Humor

Whenever the girls are unnecessarily cranky, Trevor always says, "They must be growing." Then I groan and stomp and roll my eyes because by then I've been analyzing every word, every morsel of food, every hour slept, every step taken (did they step on a dog whisker? do they have a mystery wound?) trying to decide if I should take them to the doctor.

So when we were at the doctor's office yesterday because Marta had been unnecessarily cranky for a couple of days (and sleepless, and a tiny bit runny-nosed), and when the doctor said, "No ear infection. She looks fine." I thought, "Could this be growing?"

And I have been noticing lots of growing lately. All of a sudden -- literally, in a matter of days or maybe even hours -- Marta has become a Great Big Chunk of a baby (ahem, almost 2-year-old). Her 2T jeans won't button (but need to be rolled up twice at the ankles), her shirts bulge under her belly, her cheeks are gigantic.

Berit, our bird, is suddenly taller. Her 4T jeans that I bought this fall and had to roll and belt are now about a half-inch too short (note that she's not even 4 yet). She's not whisper thin like her cousins but she is a skinny little thing, obviously because she never eats a thing in my presence (grandparents all insist she's a GREAT EATER, but then again, what do grandparents feed children? Candy, candy-flavored cereal, and ice cream, right?).

I've also been realizing every day that the girls have outgrown the learning we've been doing, and I recently called my sister in a half-panic wondering if they're going to fail college because I haven't been on top of learning for the past few months. Yesterday Berit cut up a bunch of paper animals and I cried because I didn't know she could do that. She laughed at me.

(Also yesterday Marta took her own paper animals and colored poop and pee all over their butts, then cracked up. See what I mean about not being on top of learning? Do you see what's happening to their brains?)

It occurred to me that when it comes to teaching kids... I've got nothin'. I don't know what to do with them right now, and I've started researching appropriate learning games online and now I know there's so much that I haven't done with them that I feel a bit like a fake-good mom. Like I've just been going about my stay-at-home business, playing Barbies and blocks and they're happy but their minds are all Poop. Pee. Heh.

I pulled out a couple of old standby projects and Berit had no interest. She literally mopped the floor (counter) with that coffee filter craft I posted last year. And when I asked her what she wanted to make for her grandparents for Christmas, she gave me a look like, "Lady, we buy those kinds of things."

So it looks like we're headed into changes for the new year. Bigger and better learning, along with their bigger and cuter bellies and longer and more kid-like limbs. And I have a feeling that I'll need my video camera on-hand for when they want to teach ME a thing or two.

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